Until arrival in England, I had
been trying to make happy to those people whom I should have not considered and
ignoring to those whom I am responsible to keep happy but now I will live for
my parent, my brother and will try my best to keep them happy and will be keep
begging apologies for my sins, for my defiance, for disheartening them.
I believe that solution or
treatment of frustration, depression, desperation, and achieving happiness is
not in alcohol, gambling, smoking, bad companionship or any other bad activities.
But the firm and permanent solution is hidden inside respect of parents, strong
relationships in between family, respect of elders, spending quality time with
family. Sharing grievances and happiness with parents, siblings could make you
feel happy. You can give a try. Call to them if you are separately living, meet
with them, if you are living with your parent(s) go to them give a kind hug to
them without any other negativity, rudeness, greed in your mind look into their
kind eyes like they were looking into yours when you were in buggy, hold their
kind, loving hands, with those hands they were holding your tiny hands to make
you capable of your first walk and still you are walking safely by the
blessings of God and parents help. Sacrifice your gimmicky celebrations of
weekends with your friends with benefits or temporary ones and try to celebrate
or spend some time for shopping outing, park with your parents, siblings,
family or grandparents. Talk with them listen to them with interest. Share your
views with them. Initially could be boring but I am sure that it could be fruitful
for you.
I believe that all bad things
happened with me were reactions of only my own bad actions, behavior towards my
parents, brother and somewhat non-deserving persons. Lots of things have
changed. Time has changed. My parents used to say to me, “Time, teaches everything
to everybody by itself”. That’s exactly what happened with me. My job titles in
England were: Butcher, fish monger, customer assistant at off licenses, fruit
seller at fruit stall, chicken man, fish and chips chef, kebab chef, cleaner,
and waiter, restaurant chef. When my colleagues, juniors were getting and
managing new high tech, advanced, growth and skills oriented projects I was
chopping lamb meat, donar, chicken donar, cleaning cars, moping. When they were
managing technical, sensible staff I was being scolded by unethical, rude,
uneducated, narrow-minded so called managers, bosses, and coworkers. When they
were being offered new higher positions, projects I was walking miles looking
for odd, cheap jobs. When they were being offered and getting high scaled salaries,
I was being hired on odd jobs in the name of training, and after doing 5-10
days normal full-time shifts in the name of training without money. By getting deceived
I was being given cheapest, lowest wages by imposing and emphasizing that favor
is being done on me. I believe possibly that nothing such bad happenings,
incidents would have happened with me if I was obedient to my parents in past.
May be due to so called
materialistic modern age, real and permanent happiness are not considered well or
practically followed and such things seem gimmick or emotionally nice in drama,
film, novels. Though it has a lot of importance in reality whether someone
believes it or not. It’s your wish but at least think about my words positively
not with any kind of greed or negative intention. Think now, before you will
have to regret, luckily if you could get the chance, but could be too late and
time will be passed away.
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